amazing and necessary post is amazing and necessary.
I Am The Dandy Highwayman: True Facts Your Abusers Don’t Want You to Know:
- You have inherent worth. You don’t have to do anything to prove it, just existing is enough.
- You deserve love, support and respect all the time. Not just when you did something particularly agreeable, not just when the person is in a good mood or physically and mentally well or is treated by others respectfully; you deserve to be treated well ALL THE TIME.
- You deserve to freely express your emotions and speak your own realities without fear of retaliation or shame.
- You deserve to be able to tell someone why you don’t like how they’re treating you and a) not fear retaliation, intimidation, violence or emotional manipulation because of it, and b) actually have that person listen, take it to heart, and then change their behavior accordingly.
- You deserve autonomy over yourself. You deserve to think, feel, say, wear, do, and associate with what or whomever you want without any outside pressure or control. [Clearly you aren’t free to infringe on the rights of others or treat them oppressively, but pretty much everything else is up to you and your best judgement.]
- You deserve to put yourself first. You deserve to have your life be about you. Everyone else can come after.
- You deserve space when you need space.
- You deserve to reach out to whoever you want for support.
- Your emotions and experiences are valid.
- You are important.
- You deserve to defend yourself and fight tooth and nail to ensure that the above points are acknowledged and respected.
Feel free to add to this is you think I’m missing anything.
- You deserve to cut anyone you want out of your life. Even if they’re your family. Even if you think you owe them something or if they’re good to you sometimes. If they don’t respect your boundaries and treat you how you deserve to be treated ALL THE TIME, then you are completely justified in wanting nothing to do with them.
- Your body is your own and you can do whatever the fuck you want with it. [As long as it isn’t appropriative or oppressive]
- You have the right to control how and when others touch you.
- You have the right to decline sex or other physical touching whenever you want, when ever you want (even if you’re currently engaged in sex or you were about to have sex!) without fear of retaliation, violence, or emotional manipulation.
- You have the right to self-identify in whatever ways you want without fear of gatekeeping or identity policing (fuck the dsm!) [as long as it isn’t cultually apropriative or oppressive]I’m having trouble reconciling the idea that I deserve love and good treatment all the time no matter what I do, with the idea that other people deserve to cut me out of their life to punish me :/ “Lol you’re such a piece of shit that people deserve better than to have to acknowledge your existence, but you have a right to seek support from whoever you want”. What?
Reblogging again because these are not rhetorical questions, hearing that people deserve better than to talk to me makes me pretty much want to kill myself
